I travel. I don’t go to India or Peru. But I travel. And so far I’ve come a long way.
Every day I come a long way. Some days the roads I travel were not made for travelling. But I travel anyway.
We need to talk about ME. About why most things I do, I do “on character”. My head tells me to cook. Eat. Get up. My body tells me I can’t. My legs tell me to give in and collapse. Sometimes my body doesn’t tell me. No cues, no notice. Instead it simply does.
But I just want to be. Young. Healthy. Living my life. Strong.
So I keep trying.
Trying when everything feels like shutting down and giving up.
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Sometimes it gets the better of me. And even though I want to, there’s nothing I can do.
This is why sometimes I can’t write. Why sometimes posts won’t be regular, daily, always happy. This is about why even a trip to the supermarket sometimes takes hours, if not days, to recover. And why all the fruit and sleep in the world won’t fix it.
Nothing I can do about it. Other than giving in. Accepting. Trying to charge the battery. Dealing with and dividing my little energy.
~~~
The day I got the diagnose I found my personal manual. I found ME.
This is about Myalgic Encephalomyelitis.
And from here I can continue my journey.