Self-love September

September is a month I’m very excited about! As it turns out September is the month of Self Love.

Self Love is my life’s quest.

From pulling my hair when I was not older than 4 or 5 – because I had told myself Tess was a boy’s name – to an eating disorder between the age of 11 and 22. And frankly, everything in between. I’ve always told myself

  • I don’t deserve love
  • I’m not pretty enough
  • nobody likes me, let alone will ever love me
  • I’m too fat, too short, too boring, too weird, too sensitive.

And that is just the top of the list. I have hated myself dearly. Very dearly indeed.

Change came. At some point. The realisation that you can’t search for love outside yourself, if there isn’t any inside of you. Baby step after baby step. But boy, I’ve grown! I’m surely not completely there yet, but I’m on the move. And I know where I’m heading to.

Two years ago I decided to start writing a book about self-love. A journey, literally. I quit, then continued, quit again. But at the start of 2016 I realised this is the journey I want to continue. I’m gonna take my time, it may take some time before you’ll see the result. But I came to realise that I’m an actual expert on this topic, not by study but by experience. So why would I keep telling myself I wasn’t good enough?

It’s gonna be an epic journey, a big part of my quest. I wish that anyone suffering from self-hate and related issues, will find a companion in my book. In due time…

As Self-love September is now upon us, I simply wish that anyone suffering from self-hate in whatever form has someone to reach out to, has the stamina to continue the journey along the bumpy road to Self Love. For me there’s no way back and I know if I can walk this road, so can you. Let’s make this month a powerful one!

If you have any thoughts, if you want to share a piece of your Self Love journey – do feel free to get in touch via the contact-form on the About-page or via social media. Or share this blog, to let more people know about #selfloveseptember!

IMG_4737

For you.

A Heart A Day #11

Day #11. Today’s heart from me to you. Another rainbow coloured heart. Using pencils, fineliner and ruler.

What are your thoughts on self-compassion? Are you as kind to yourself as you are to others? The way your mind speaks to you, would you accept that from anyone else? Share your thoughts and – if you wish – create a heart or take a picture of a heart you found. Use #aheartaday.

With love,
Tess

12

 

[I love love and I love hearts! But oh, there’s too little of it, this world needs more love. So let’s change that, step by step. Away with pessimism. Away with hate. Let’s fill this world with love. And hearts. To show compassion towards each other, towards the planet, towards ourselves. It proves to be difficult for so many of us. But instead of judging it’s more meaningful to show love, to respond with love, to act out of love. Say it with hearts.

I’m sharing A Heart A Day. Homemade. Every day I will create a heart and post it on this blog. Will you help me make love and hearts spread like a contagious but healthy disease?]

A Heart A Day #10

It’s Gay Pride in Amsterdam, so for today’s heart from me to you I thought I’d stick to the colours of the rainbow. This heart turned into my morning meditation, then got me into a drawing-flow.

Gay Pride and compassion are an interesting duo, I think. We celebrate that everyone has the right to be who he or she wants to be, no matter what sexuality. Pretty compassionate. Yet so many people have something to say about some other’s sexuality. Judgement seems to be around the corner. Especially on days like these.
But what if all people judging others would start with themselves? If they would start to feel, listen to themselves. Would they maybe be surprised to hear a total new story, to see a whole new picture, that isn’t influenced by parents, friends, neighbours, isn’t influenced by someone else’s story and opinion? Would that make them more compassionate? In my ideal world, yes, it would.

10

[I love love and I love hearts! But oh, there’s too little of it, this world needs more love. So let’s change that, step by step. Away with pessimism. Away with hate. Let’s fill this world with love. And hearts. To show compassion towards each other, towards the planet, towards ourselves. It proves to be difficult for so many of us. But instead of judging it’s more meaningful to show love, to respond with love, to act out of love. Say it with hearts.

I’m sharing A Heart A Day. Homemade. Every day I will create a heart and post it on this blog. Will you help me make love and hearts spread like a contagious but healthy disease?]